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Title: The Other End Of The Red String

Author: [livejournal.com profile] yurikamome19

Pairing: YutoYama

Rating: pg-13

Genre: AU, BL, romance, almost angst-free




The morning after the eventful Valentine’s day is rather calm and peaceful despite of the sun that seems like choosing to hide behind layer after layer of clouds again today. Yamada Ryosuke is raising his arms up and stretching his body while looking at nothing in particular through the window, groaning in low voice because he feels slightly sore after last night’s intense love-making with his boyfriend. He turns his body to the bed, to where a lanky guy is sleeping with duvet pooling around his waist and showing his naked torso that has some hickeys, his doing, and the gorgeous face is partly hidden by the raven hair that massively messy yet sexy nevertheless.

Yuto doesn’t wake up even when the natural light touching his face and he doesn’t blame him for that, it’s cloudy outside and there’s not much light to shake Yuto from his slumber. The corner of Ryosuke’s lip curls into a soft smile to watch his lover sleeping soundly, he feels all kind of warm in his heart and flutter in his stomach. It’s a familiar feelings that he recognizes, he felt it when he was around Yuto back then, he felt it when he was with Julien, and now he feels like this toward Yuto again.

Two years ago when he was with Julien, when he fell so hard to him… he thought, really thought, that Julien was his ‘the one’. He really believed that if his life was a story, then it would have been started when Julien came into his life and everything that happened before Julien was something irrelevant. Because it’s what happened in movies and novels, right? One day someone comes into the protagonist’ life and that person is absolutely the one that is destined for him/her, that one person whom the writer introduced to the protagonist first in the beginning of the story.

When he fell for Julien… he thought that everything suddenly made sense. He felt like his story never really started before he met him, that it was all narrative before and it became real at that moment they sat next to each other. He really thought that Julien was his ‘the one’ just like in those movies and novels. Then his story… his story would tell about how they got close, about how falling in love to him was so easy but it was scary as well because it was beautiful and he was scared of ruining it. It would tell about how they were so happy together, struggling with their differences yet they were still strong together and they would still love each other.

It was what he thought, it was what he kept telling himself when he was suffering last year, that his problem with Julien was just a phase, just some hurdle everyone was facing in movies and novels that meant to test the relationship, to test how much they loved each other and willing to do sacrifices for the other. So he did it, he was the one who made the sacrifices and hurting for the sake of the relationship because he believed in them. It was okay, it was okay, Julien was his soulmate, they would always be together, it would work out in the end… he kept saying that to himself.

But it hurt. It hurt and he was not as strong as those characters in books and movies.

If his life was a story, then it would start with Julien… but it wouldn’t have the happy ending that he wanted.

It won’t… because everything has changed between them.

Everything…

That kind of thought filled his mind when he was still in love in Julien and a part of him still hoped for a happy ending of his story. Now, standing here near the bed where Yuto is sleeping… he is not really sure that his story started with Julien anymore. Maybe… maybe it started when he met Yuto on that first day of high school and he gave Yuto his virginity. Damn Yuto for being so irresistible and confident even then when he was only fifteen. Damn Yuto for showing him the world that he had never seen before, both about the sex and the kind of life Yuto had. Damn Yuto for making him to fall madly in love with him and breaking his heart and making it whole again.

Seriously, if his life was a story about him and Yuto, then it would be one hell of a complicated love story. Yamada Ryosuke shakes his head at that thought, scoffing a laugh because a story or not his life with Yuto is a giant mess.

“if we’re meant to be together then it’s such a bad joke of God, or the cupid really made a mess of our red string for we’ve been through a lot to be here now” he said to Yuto, the sleeping Yuto, softly brushing the fringe off Yuto’s face and having a sudden urge to touch Yuto’s long eye-lashes then count it. He’s weird, yeah. Yuto said that million times at his attempt to do that whenever he was staring at him.

Does he love Yuto?

Yes.

Absolutely.

Yuto is important to him, someone that he can’t ever hate and always loves no matter what. But is it love as in ‘love’ that he felt to Julien, that strong force that was like life itself, a love that could make him to feel alive and make everything that he saw to be more vivid and beautiful?

No.

He loves Yuto, he loves when Yuto is around and he loves to be around him and be the center of Yuto’s affection. He loves to be loved by Yuto and he also loves taking care of him, making him smile… he loves all of that, he really does. But it’s not the same like his feelings to Julien, and it’s not love. At least not yet. Because what he feels toward Yuto, what he said to him when they moved in here, it was true. He is falling in love to him, to Yuto. It’s just not as strong as Yuto wants it to be yet and he… he is still afraid to do this free-fall into love.

But he is trying. For Yuto’s sake, he is trying not to be afraid anymore. Yuto said that he could take this slowly, that he would wait… and he feels so grateful that Yuto understands and be patient with him. Now how could he not fall in love with this guy?

Softly, he lands a kiss on Yuto’s temple and silently vows that he will say it someday. “wait for me, please” he says before he takes his lips as tender as he kissed his forehead earlier.

It would have been perfect if Nakajima Yuto woke up now, but nah he is still sleeping just like how Ryosuke always slept when Yuto confessed to him when Ryosuke was still with Julien. But it’s okay, they are together and they have plenty of time to say what they want to say to each other.



“oh fuck, this is so delicious! You have to try!” Yamada Ryosuke stabs a piece of his breakfast waffle, stretching the fork to Nakajima Yuto’s mouth which is still filled with vegetable salad. But Ryosuke doesn’t care, he wants Yuto to try and willing to wait for him to finish chewing and gulping so he can try his waffle.

Yuto opens his mouth, letting Ryosuke to feed him as if they’re alone in the restaurant. But obviously they’re not the only customers there, a lot of people are in that restaurant for brunch and here they are being so casually lovey-dovey like they own the place. “nah, you overrated it” Yuto returns. When Ryosuke is hungry, he’ll eat anything and claim that it’s delicious even if the taste is just normal.

“you’re just too hungry. Eat a lot” Yuto says, a bit concerned that they are eating breakfast at 11 and telling himself that he has to take a better care of Ryosuke who just got out of recovery. It’s fine if it’s only him who had a messed up dining schedule, but he is with Ryosuke now, he is living with him, and he thinks that he shouldn’t stick to this lifestyle anymore. Breakfast should be done at around 8 everyday from now on, he told himself.

“we have to buy some breads and cereals later” Yuto looks at Ryosuke who is busy stuffing his mouth with waffle and munching and gulping, cheeks are stretched and round, still he is trying to say something… too adorable for this world.

“don’t speak. But I know what you just said. We have to buy those for breakfast so we won’t have to call delivery or go out for breakfast. It wastes time and by the time we’ve got to the place it’s not a breakfast time anymore” Ryosuke lets out a grumble again, barely understandable, yet he still catches what he said, “because it’s not a healthy lifestyle. You like eating and you always have a right eating cycle, just because we live together in my mansion doesn’t mean you have to follow my rules and lifestyle”

Yamada Ryosuke’s face almost breaks into a huge smile, which will be a bizarre thing because his mouth is full with waffle, but he is so touched he just can’t stay in his seat and stands up to kiss Yuto full on his mouth. “ew, that’s sticky” Yuto complains with a not-really-complaining expression, laughing and eww-ing at the same time because he just kissed him while his mouth is kinda smeared with maple syrup of the waffle.

Aww, Yuto wants to do breakfast from now on for him~ Isn’t that sweet? By the way, it’s fine even if they don’t do real breakfast since he ate snack every morning for breakfast while Yuto had his glass of milk. However, it’s better if Yuto wants them to eat breakfast in their home starting tomorrow. He likes breakfast at home, it just makes the home more homey, and this is also healthier for them anyway.

At times like this, when Yuto is willing to change just for his sake… he is once again reminded of how much Yuto loves and cares about him, about his well-being and health and needs, and it’s just… so touching. Yuto shows him that they are real, that his feelings is real and that he wants him as equal in the relationship, that he respects him and adores him more than what he knows. At times like this, he really wants to kiss Yuto and express what he can’t convey with mere string of words.

It’d be inappropriate to kiss Yuto and do what he thought in a public place, let alone in a fancy classy restaurant downtown where the customers are people who most-likely work in an élite companies. So he doesn’t kiss Yuto there, but he also doesn’t change his mind about it since the fluttery feelings, the butterflies, never leave him while he is finishing his meal. He is staring at Yuto during their late brunch and early lunch, with so much affection that he doesn’t try to hide from Yuto. He lets himself bare for Yuto to see, so he can feel that he is falling for him.

He takes Yuto to the restaurant’s toilet after they finished their meal, locking themselves in one of the empty cubicles and shoving Yuto on the toilet seat. “I’ve been wanting to do this” he takes Yuto’s face to his hands, barely catches a joyful smirk across that face before he crashes his lips on Yuto’s mouth as he is sighing to the taste that his soul has wanted.

The kiss is fierce and passionate, but it’s not hurried and driven by mad lust. Yuto’s tongue is lapping on his in such a tender expertise that twists his stomach in all kind of delightful tornado and makes him to moan softly. His body needs more and more of connection with Yuto, so he sits on his lap, making it easier for them to kiss and touch each other. He seriously didn’t plan to do more than just a kiss when he dragged Yuto to the toilet, but now he can’t stop himself from wanting his lover. And Yuto knows that.

Nakajima Yuto knows exactly what kind of kiss that speaks sex for his beloved boyfriend Yamada Ryosuke. Well, he knows him for far too long not to know that. He knows what kind of gaze he gives when he wants him. Ryosuke gives it away from the way he stares at him, the way he kisses him, the way he touches him, and the tiny desperate breathy moans that escapes his lips. It’s all the signs when Yamada Ryosuke is way too far to go back, that he wants him so bad and nothing can stop him.

And it’s not like Yuto wants to stop Ryosuke. He always yearns for him. All the time.

“mmh…” Ryosuke moans within their kiss when his hand finds his bulge, making it harder under his slow teasing stroke.

He disconnects his lips from Ryosuke’s, whispering so close to those wet puckering mouth, “I love the sound you make, but don’t make too much noise”

Ryosuke’s eyes are glazed with anticipation and longing and affection that he thinks that he may be drowning in there when he is taking out his member from his pants. He has to bite his own moan and groan upon watching how euphoric Ryosuke’s expression as his hand is working on his shaft. Ryosuke’s fingers are slightly trembling when he is trying to open his jeans, but those fingers are gripping and tugging on him with no hesitance it makes his head reeling.

Their mouths find each other to stifle their moans as their hands are jerking each other in almost the same pace, raising the temperature of their bodies and melting their brains with each stroke of hands. The movement of Ryosuke’s hand is stopped when he is about to come and he is burying his face on Yuto’s shoulder, biting him through the plaid shirt that Yuto is wearing. Yuto is quick to reach for the tissue just before Ryosuke spills his load, containing it perfectly so it won’t stain their clothes as his shorter boyfriend is trembling in pleasure.

There is a smile on Ryosuke’s face when Yuto pulls him up as he is about to get down on his knees and suck him, asking him to sit on the toilet instead if he is gonna do it. And there he is blowing Yuto while the latter is watching him and stroking his face so dearly until the pleasure is too intense and his hand is grabbing on his shoulder for support when he is coming in his mouth, hot and thick. Ryosuke pulls his mouth from him slowly, swallowing one last spurt of Yuto’s seeds and licking the head clean before he gives his boyfriend a satisfied toothy grin.

Seeing Ryosuke like that, seemingly delighted after he blew him, makes Nakajima Yuto to feel amused when he remembers that there was a time in the past when Yamada Ryosuke didn’t want to put him in his mouth. You see, Ryosuke was very much straight back then, even when they met for the first time. The only reason Ryosuke wanted to have sex with him – who was pretty much experimental with his sexuality – was because Ryosuke was curious about gay sex and he was good at convincing him and turning him on that Ryosuke gave his first time to him. But even though Ryosuke liked their sex, loved it, actually, the boy didn’t let him to put his member anywhere near his mouth let alone swallowing his load.

But that mouth of Ryosuke was so damn enticing even then in high school that he really wanted it around his member, and one day he finally had something to bargain with so his fantasy would come true. This particular piece of memory also related to the history why he and Ryosuke always shared meals although he hated sharing food or eating utensils with anyone, and about why he who was picky about food trusting Ryosuke’s taste buds.

It was almost a year after they met, a very satisfying and full-of-fun (and party and sex) kind of year, when they were exhausted of end-of-semester exams and tired of everything and felt the urge to just rip the exam paper or burn it. It was after school when Ryosuke dragged his tired ass to this shabby-looking family restaurant near their school because Ryosuke told him that he owed him one for giving him a cheating paper earlier in their exam and scored him a detention because he got caught. So the least he could do was paying for everything that he would eat, Ryosuke said.

Being raised in a rich family, he had an A-rank picky tongue if it’s about food or drink. His mom always said that he should never eat in any suspicious place and receive food or drink from a stranger, telling him story about Hansel and Gretel the whole time before he slept when he was a child he was almost traumatized to eat any sweet especially if it was sold by an old woman. So, obviously when Ryosuke took him to the restaurant he didn’t eat or drink anything, just watching Ryosuke happily flipping the menu with a very bored expression.

“I’ll leave the money for you. I’m going home” he took his black leather satchel as he stood up, about to leave Ryosuke there because waiting for Ryosuke to finish eating was absolutely pointless and wasting his precious time.

“what? NO!” Ryosuke grabbed the sling of his satchel bag before he could step further away, “I wasn’t ratting your ass out to the teacher about that cheating paper. I don’t want to eat alone, it’s embarrassing. Put your skinny ungrateful ass back there” the spoon that had a little bit of mozzarella cheese from the doria that Ryosuke ordered was pointing at the seat in front of him where he sat on a second ago.

Ryosuke clearly didn’t want him to leave because he wanted to make him suffer. But hell, there was no way he would stay here. “fuck you, Ryosuke. I’m starving” yep, that’s what an exam did to a person. Even if he didn’t use his brain and waiting for Ryosuke to pass him a cheating note that he received from this smart girl he was dating (Ryosuke had a habit to flirt with a smart girl a month before exam just so she would help him with exam and dumped her right after exam week ended), still he was exhausted and hungry as hell.

“then let’s eat this with me” Ryosuke waved his arms open to the table where a plate of beef stew hamburg steak, caramel honey pancake, Milano-style doria, corn mayonnaise pizza and a big glass of lemon iced-tea were scattered on it.

“no way in hell I’ll eat that thing” he said with an offensive crunching of face, and of course it made Ryosuke to feel so offended because he liked the restaurant’s food.

“rude! All of these are delicious!” Ryosuke defended the meals like he defended his dignity. But back then he was just as stubborn as Ryosuke, and absolutely hated losing an argument, so he fired back.

“I thought all those parties had somehow raised the level of your taste buds. But I don’t think so anymore” see, Ryosuke had tailed him to any of the corporate party because he wanted to eat, Ryosuke also went to so many high-class restaurant with him when they were hanging out after school before they went to clubs with fake IDs. So yeah, he really thought that Ryosuke somehow had upgraded his tongue.

“hey, what is wrong with you? It’s really good. Just try it!”

“no! And if I say no then it means NO!”

Aaaand they did it until few rounds of ‘try it!’ and ‘no!’ and people started to whisper around them. He hated making a scene, so he sat back and glared at Ryosuke, asking him to just finish eating soon so he could leave.

But you readers know Yamada Ryosuke, he could be a bit stubborn about thing and he never gave up, so he still asked Yuto to try. And that was when Yuto had a brilliant idea, “okay, fine. I’ll eat that. I’ll fucking eat this food but you have to do what I want”

“and what is that?” Ryosuke asked him with a pair of wary eyes, sensing that it would not be something good for him.

He smirked and said, “blowjob and you let me come in your mouth”

“HELL NO” Ryosuke quickly replied, shouted it out and made some people to turn their heads at their booth beside the window.

“you know the saying ‘eye for an eye’ right? So mouth for a mouth. Just so you know, I never share food or spoon with anyone before. It’s disgusting, I hate it. So it’s only fair if you do the thing that you hate too, using your mouth to blow me” he made a fair point, as much as he could.

“I’m so fuckin hate you”

“say that yesterday when you called me out of the class and said ‘fuck, I’m so tired of this exam shit. Let’s fuck’” he rolled his eyes. “So?”

“I blow you but you don’t come in my mouth. Deal?” Ryosuke tried to bargain with him but he didn’t do that.

“nah, too easy for you. I put so many stakes here. Up it” he demanded with a poker face as if he was a gambler in Vegas’ casino.

Ryosuke shuddered and shook his head, probably imagining about blowing him and letting him come in his mouth and he hated the image. “I don’t want you to come in my mouth!”

“fine. On your face then” he groaned and backed off since it seemed like Ryosuke really didn’t want to do that, thinking that it was still early for the boy. Nah, he would have a way to make Yamada Ryosuke do that sooner or later. “it’s the last deal. Take it or leave it”

“okay! I agree” Ryosuke grudgingly dipped his spoon to the doria that looked like a dog’s meal, “Now eat this” and well, he almost cancelled the deal when he saw the spoon with a nasty mess on it being held up in front of his face by Ryosuke. He only opened his mouth and let Ryosuke feed him when he remembered about the blowjob and there was an amazing image of Ryosuke’s lips around his erection.

Unexpectedly, he liked the food and Ryosuke smiled at him smugly then said that he didn’t have standard taste bud like what he had accused him to and that he shouldn’t judge a restaurant by its appearance. So after that, Ryosuke always tasted the food in a new place that they visited and Ryosuke would tell him if it’s delicious before he ate it too, because blowjob always entailed. Soon, Ryosuke didn’t need blowjob to make him eat the food and share with him, he did it because he trusted Ryosuke’s tongue.

But around that time Ryosuke was falling in love with him he would give him blowjob willingly, even without any deal. And well, Ryosuke also loved him so bad that he let him come in his mouth and swallowed. At that time, it felt so damn good to see Ryosuke being such an obedient puppy and doing everything that he asked him to. But then he fell in love with Ryosuke and he realized that he was such a jerk for using Ryosuke’s feelings to fulfill his sex fantasy.


So yeah, that’s what happened. And it’s funny to think that that Ryosuke has become his Ryosuke who is even better of giving a head and doesn’t mind licking him clean. They’ve come a long way to get here indeed.

“what are you thinking?” Ryosuke puts his arms around his neck, coaxing him for a kiss that he doesn’t intend to refuse. Smashing his lips onto Ryosuke’s feels so right, feels so good, calming down his erratic heartbeat post the orgasm, makes it to beat almost normally.

He parts away from Ryosuke after a hard smooch, brushing his thumb over Ryosuke’s satin-like smooth lips as he says, “just remembered the first time you gave me a blowjob”

“ugh, that” Ryosuke cringes, clearly he doesn’t fond of the memory and he doesn’t blame him. It was horrible for few reasons after all.

“yeah, that” he says, missing Ryosuke’s warmth when his lover is disconnecting his body from him just so he can fix his appearances a foot away from him.

“I was terrible at it”

He nods, agreeing with him because it’s true. Ryosuke was so bad at it and that was one of the reasons why he disliked being reminded of it. “yep. But you learned fast” he curves a smirk on his face.

“I’m a genius” and Ryosuke returns his smirk with a very smug smile as he is putting the beast back in its cage, zipping up his pants after Ryosuke’s blowjob and fixing his belt.

Shaking his head, he tells Ryosuke, “baby, you’re anything but that”

“shut up” Ryosuke rolls his eyes and punches him on the chest, he chuckles and takes his hand to pull him closer, kissing him on the mouth before they leave the toilet cubicle together, not minding a surprised wide-eyed look from a man who is washing his hand in the sink and just exiting the toilet with a broad smile on their faces.

After the restaurant, they go back to the street and walk around in the weather that is warm enough for a winter. But even so, Yamada Ryosuke is still dipping his gloved hands to his coat pocket and putting on his ear muffs, making it a bit hard for Nakajima Yuto to talk to him while they’re walking or when he wants to warn him that the pavement is slippery. Yuto doesn’t hold Ryosuke’s hand, and it’s not because he spares the public’s eyes from their gayness, it’s just that he knows that Ryosuke needs to protect himself from cold. So he just holds the small of Ryosuke’s back in case his lover slips on the icy pavement or about to bump into stranger because he is busy looking around to find a jewelry store.

Their outing that day is not only to get some brunch, Ryosuke wanted to go out – even though he liked to hole up in the winter like a bear – because he said he had to buy something in the jewelry store. When Yuto asked him what he wanted to buy this morning, Ryosuke said that he wanted to buy an earring and told him that he wanted to pierce his ear, to commemorate that he was out the recovery and back to his normal life.

So yeah, they are now inside a jewelry store, the second shop that they’ve stopped by at today since Ryosuke thought that the price was too expensive for his wallet in the first shop and he didn’t want to accept Yuto’s money, saying that he had to buy it with his own money. At first, Yuto is accompanying Ryosuke to pick the earring for his soon-will-be-pierced ear and giving him some advises to some resin studs earring, but then he gets distracted by some other jewelry in the display, rings.

You see, he wants to give Ryosuke something, a ring. But no, it’s not an engagement ring, he is not proposing him although he also cannot imagine life without Ryosuke. But yeah, it’s not an engagement ring. He just wants to put a ring on Ryosuke’s finger, to show his commitment to the relationship and obviously because he wants Ryosuke to always be reminded that he is taken by him, that he is his. Silly ego, he knows, but he can’t help it. So now his eyes are focused to find the ring for Ryosuke, something that doesn’t speak ‘too much’ and more like ‘casual’ couple rings.

There are some interesting couple rings in the display but he is quick to decide which one will be perfect for them. He is contemplated between two choices though, this pair of black titanium rings with heartbeat-like decoration engraved on the bands or the other pair which is shaped like puzzle pieces, and actually can be put together into one ring. Obviously, he wants to take that puzzle ring, but it may be a bit too much and puzzling Ryosuke. Huh, yeah he did that. So… maybe he should take that heartbeat rings?

“what are you doing?” Ryosuke’s warmth hits his arm first before his ears catch his voice, his lover brushes on his side when he is leaning to look at the display where his gaze is locked in. “rings?” Ryosuke gives him a funny look and amused smile, definitely thinking what he thought he would be thinking earlier.

“I’m not proposing you. I’d buy one with rare diamonds and made from purest gold if it’s for that. It’s just normal couple rings” he explains while studying Ryosuke’s expression to what he is saying because he basically just blurts out that he has a plan to propose him even if it’s not soon.

Then, when he thinks that Ryosuke won’t like it, or that this kind of commitment is too heavy for their not-yet-two-months’ relationship, he quickly says something that hopefully is going to put pressure away from him. Damage control! “but if you don’t want to, if you think that it’s too soon… that’s okay“

However, Ryosuke smiles at him and hell it is such a nice breeze to his panicking mind, “no, let’s buy it” his lover says.

“really?” he can’t believe it. So he has to ask that dumb question just to make sure that his ears didn’t play with his heart.

“mm-hm. Which one do you like? Personally, I like that puzzle-like couple rings. It’s cute. And don’t you think that it’s so us? I mean, we’ve matched so damn perfectly, well… almost, since the first day and… ” Ryosuke turns away from the display, looking at him, “and I want us to always be like that”

How could Ryosuke laugh if off when he said something corny but he said it too, way too lightly yet so sweet, to him? And damn his heart for not taking this just as lightly, or laughing it off like Ryosuke or teasing Ryosuke about it just like what he did to him, and beating so fast instead. He should have laughed just like what Ryosuke often did, or saying ‘you silly~’ or something, anything! But no, he is so speechless. And happy. Heck, he is super happy to hear that from Ryosuke. That’s what he thought when he saw the rings too, that it’s so him and Ryosuke.

He is still speechless and stunned for a moment, only staring at Ryosuke and trying to tame the butterflies in his belly that he doesn’t realize about what is happening until Ryosuke takes his left hand and slips the ring on his ring finger. “people will think we’re engaged” he says as Ryosuke puts the other ring to his own left hand’s ring finger.

“Good then. I mean the ring to be ‘mosquito’ repellant too anyway” Ryosuke air-quoted, and he knows that Ryosuke is referring to girls and basically everyone who checks on him. “so people know that you’re taken”

He swears that he and Ryosuke are a match, even their way of thinking is almost the same! “you know, I had the same thought” he admits.

“of course we are. I know you, you always hate when people touch what is yours”

“yeah” he grins sheepishly. Nobody could taste his food or drink, nobody could drive his car, nobody could get inside his home, nobody could use his clothes… he had so many rules before, but Ryosuke was annoying enough to make him break some of the rules, almost all of it, he is still not letting Ryosuke drive one of his cars.



“oh God” In between him and Ryosuke, he is probably the most scared one when the man who is one of the staffs in a piercing place is about to pierce Ryosuke’s ear.

Ryosuke is clearly afraid of the pain, but his boyfriend can still have a chat with the man and laugh at that man’s joke when he said that he shouldn’t be afraid for Ryosuke since making a hole in Ryosuke’s earlobe will be less painful than shoving something up a hole. He seriously can’t with any dirty joke right now. He can’t even begin to form a word after the man explained about some equipments that Ryosuke should choose to pierce his ear before he said that stupid joke.

He starts to think that it’s such a bad idea to celebrate the end of the recovery by make a hole in the ear, with another pain. But Ryosuke has decided, and now he has to just sit back and relax and well… get a small heart attack when Ryosuke wincing in pain when the needle goes through his earlobe. Ryosuke is okay though, grinning at him and looking so satisfied when he is checking the earring on his left ear, then showing him the stud earring with small resin dome that looks like nebula on his ear. And although he was disagree with this whole thing earlier, he has to admit that it looks good on Ryosuke.

Buying the treatment products that are listed by his cousin is what Nakajima Yuto do before he and Ryosuke go back home. Keiko said that it’s important to treat the new piercing right so it won’t get infected, saying that the piercing shouldn’t get any contact with shampoo, conditioner or soap for at least a week. So he tells Ryosuke that he is gonna help him with shower and wash his hair and clean his piercing until it heals, which he thinks that he somehow will enjoy the work. One thing that he hates from this ‘another recovery’ thing is that he can’t touch Ryosuke’s ear or lick it or nibble on it, and it sucks because he loves doing it when they’re making love. But well, he can deal with it just so Ryosuke won’t get an infection.

“I kinda wonder if I’m psychic” Yamada Ryosuke says when Nakajima Yuto is dapping a cotton ball over his piercing after cleaning it using sea salt and other stuffs exactly like what his cousin has instructed. They are sitting on the couch in their living room, still in their bathrobes after the shower, facing each other as the TV on top of the fireplace is set on a music-only channel and playing a random new song of the week.

“why?” Yuto asks, moving away from Ryosuke’s ear for a little so he can see his face and the smile that he has on his lips.

“well, even though you were so damn cruel and heartless to everyone, and me, I somehow couldn’t stop loving you and hating you back then. I think I’ve always known that you can take care of people. I never thought that it would be me though. I thought it would be someone else, and gosh… I was terribly jealous at that someone you would fall in love with, because I knew you would fall hard and you would devote all of yourself just for that person. Even if you were such a jerk, I think I knew that you were not that bad, that you could love and change” Ryosuke touches his face, and it feels a bit cold when the titanium ring meets his cheek. A nice kind of cold, it makes him to know that Ryosuke is his.

Ryosuke’s almond eyes softly gleam when he smiles, and of course his heart is thumping faster than usual staring at the pair of his wide eyes. “I’m glad it’s me that you love”

“I’m glad that it’s you too” he lands a chaste kiss on Ryosuke’s lips that taste like pizza they both ate right after the shower, smiling back at him then going back to do the rest of treatment he has to do before they’re going to bed. And doing what? Sleep, duh.

Yamada Ryosuke is yawning as he is slipping an old sweater he’s had since high school on his body which only has a piece of boxer covering a small part of it, not aware that Nakajima Yuto is looking at him from his part of the closet, stopping what he is doing and forgetting to wear his pajama when he looks at how vulnerable and adorable his lover is when he is sleepy. Ryosuke leaves the closet first, slamming his body on the bed with a comfortable groan follows later, along with a rustle of him wiggling and struggling to get under the duvet.

The bedroom is back to its dim state when the closet is closed behind Yuto, the fluorescent paint on the ceilings is the only one that helps him to find his way to the bed and lying on it without accidentally crushing Ryosuke who is already making himself comfortable under the blanket, opening his eyes after he gives a small peck on his forehead. He is about to say ‘good night’ to Ryosuke if it’s not for his phone ringing on the bedside table.

“ugh” he automatically groans when he reads the text, piquing Ryosuke’s curiosity of what makes him furrowing his eyebrows.

Ryosuke sits on the bed, resting his chin on his shoulder and peeking at the screen of his phone, “what’s wrong?”

“it’s Keiko. She wanted to know if I’ve told you about the housewarming party” he shows the text to Ryosuke who just glances at it and throws a question at him.

“housewarming party?”

He sighs tiredly, crossing his legs on the bed and locking his gaze at Ryosuke to explain the case. “yeah, I forgot to tell you about it earlier. So apparently Keiko told everyone in my family that you’re okay now, and that we’re living together, so they want to visit our mansion and Keiko said we should just throw a housewarming party”

“you Nakajima clan really loves party” Ryosuke shakes his head in amusement, laughing a bit at that true fact.

“yeah, we are. But honestly, I think everyone just wants to see you, since they were so worried about you and wanted to visit you in Kyoto but obviously I told them to stay the fuck away because you needed space” he says.

His relatives were so sad to hear that Ryosuke got an accident last year when they had a gathering for his grandfather. They wanted to visit Ryosuke and did something for him, but of course he snapped at their good intentions and basically screamed so they would not bother Ryosuke. And his mom definitely apologized on his behalf and explained everything including his feelings to Ryosuke.

Ryosuke chuckles, probably imagining him being upset at his family. “then let’s throw a party”

“I don’t like people swarming in here” yeah, the problem isn’t only about Ryosuke’s willingness, it’s him.

“they’re not ‘people’, they are your relatives. We’ll just make this floor unavailable for show if you’re not comfortable with it”

But well, his lover’s words make him to be a little bit milder about this. And he suddenly thinks that his cousin probably asked him to talk with Ryosuke about it because she knew that Ryosuke would convince him and that he would listen to him. “okay, but… tell your parents to come too. I believe they want to know if you’re doing good, and I want to show them that you’re doing good so they won’t get worried of you”

And yes, if he is gonna do it then he wants Ryosuke’s family to be there too. He needs to put their minds at ease by showing them that Ryosuke is all right now since they looked so worried that he took Ryosuke with him to Tokyo more than a month ago. He also wants them to know that Ryosuke is happy and that he is treating him well, that’s the least he can do to Ryosuke’s parents who found that their only son got an accident the last time he was away from them. He just wants them to know that it won’t happen again, that they won’t get that heartbreaking phone call from the hospital anymore, that they won’t see Ryosuke suffering for the second time.

A smile curls on Ryosuke’s face, and from the way he is staring at him… he knows that his feelings and thoughts are visible in his face. “okay. I’ll call them tomorrow”




a/n: what is the point of this fic again? Right, it's to follow Ryosuke's journey to love Yuto again :)

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