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[personal profile] yurikamome19
Title: Love, heartbreak, and betrayal

Author: [livejournal.com profile] yurikamome19

Pairing: YutoYamaKeito

Rating: pg-13

Genre: BL, angst

They were meant to be.

That was what Nakajima Yuto knew when on one fine day in the beginning of winter, as the weather became colder and the hot coffee he held making a stain of white fog on his glasses. And he smiled beside him, a smile that could clear any of his doubt of the future, of what they would become. Yamada Ryosuke was the only one that was clear in his vague thought of the future.

He knew what it meant. He knew what Ryosuke meant to him. He knew that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with him, beside him, devoting his heart and soul to the guy that he met in one of his class in pre-med few years ago.

And so he took his cheek to his hand, those chestnut eyes turning at him, peeking through the glasses and some strands of brown hair that almost covered his eyes because he had no time to cut his hair due to their extreme working hour. But he was still beautiful… even after a long night in the ER, he was still stunning and one look at him was enough to make his heart race.

“Let’s get married, Ryosuke”

It came so unexpected. There was no ring, they were outside in the rooftop of the hospital they were both working as interns, they looked like a mess after a whole day and night of tending their patients and studying... it was unplanned, but it didn’t mean that his feelings wasn’t real. He wanted Ryosuke in his life, from now on until forever.

“we’re still students, and interns. I don’t know if we can get through all of this together with so much pressure in our study, work, and most-likely our families later, but I don’t want to wait. I want us to live together and face whatever it is that will happen in our life, with you. I love you, Ryosuke… and I don’t want us to waste time with dating because you are more than just a boyfriend to me, I don’t want you to just be my boyfriend. I want you to be my partner in life, Ryosuke. So please, marry me”

Yamada Ryosuke’s eyes became watery just like his own eyes, and it was not the fault of the cold wind of winter blowing on them, it was something else… something that they both felt as flashes of their days together came running in their minds.

Happiness, sadness, frustration, loneliness… they had a taste of those in the last couple years, trying to balance the difficult life as a medical student, being gay, and the consequences that they had to face when they decided to have a relationship. It was hard… but Nakajima Yuto would not want it any other way, and he believed that Yamada Ryosuke felt the same.

“yes” Ryosuke nodded, chuckled and sobbed altogether. Yuto was in tears when Ryosuke leaned his head to his chest, embracing him while trying to not spill the coffee to their white coat and getting scolded by their supervisor.

The white sheets that were hung around them in the rooftop were flapping, blown by the wind, hiding their figures and the kiss that was filled with the promise of loving each other until their dying breaths.

It was the most right decision Nakajima Yuto had ever had in his life. He knew that when Yamada Ryosuke walked toward him through rows of people in the aisle, his eyes stared at no one but him who waited for him with his wedding vow scrambled in his head. Ryosuke chuckled when he forgot, totally couldn’t remember, the vow he wrote the other day and he could only say that he would not be able to live without him. That smile he loved so much was on his face... and he was sure he wanted to be with him his whole life, he knew he didn’t make a wrong decision. He knew that Yamada Ryosuke was meant to be there with him, and forever until the death do them apart.

They were together through everything. The crazy schedule of shifting between being an intern and studying to graduate from the medical school, finding surrogate mother for they wanted to have kids, all the process with the government and those complicated things when they brought the twins to their home, raising their kids while both of them were busy working, the death of Yuto’s father and the sudden responsibility to be the head of Nakajima family and taking care of his father’s business… they were together through all of that.

They were a happy family with twin sons who always found a way to give their parents’ headache because they couldn’t stop fighting over a toy or snack or arguing about who had the right to sit on the front passenger seat in the car ever since they knew how to spell a word up until they were nine. Like any other couple and family, Yuto and Ryosuke fought every once in a while over a small matter or a big one, but never once it severed their relationship. Ryosuke was always there when it was hard for Yuto to deal with everything, just like Yuto gave everything that Ryosuke wanted.

For Nakajima Yuto, Ryosuke was more than a spouse and the person he loved with his whole heart. He was his best friend, his family, someone that he could bare all of his emotions to, someone that he trusted without saying, someone that he knew would love him endlessly like what they said in their wedding vows on that day they were married to each other.

But then it happened. Yamada Ryosuke cheated on him.

Nakajima Yuto always knew he loved Ryosuke. But he never knew that Ryosuke could break him that much. He never thought about him cheating or betraying him.

Because he knew him.

He knew him for so long and he never thought of that, not even once because he trusted him…

But apparently, he didn’t know him at all.

Yamada Ryosuke cheated on him and he was more than devastated.

He couldn’t take it. He couldn’t take it he felt like he was going insane.

It started as a rumor, a baseless rumor for him when he first heard about it. He remembered he shook the rumor off easily from his mind, knowing that Ryosuke would not go for a date with someone and do the things the rumor said he did. He didn’t even say what he had heard to Ryosuke when he was back home, because it was nothing for him, and there was too many things he should handle when he was at home. Managing Nakajima family’s business while being a doctor and a father was hard, it was like a day was never enough to finish his work and take a rest.

Ryosuke was busy just like him, working in different hospital than him during the day and tending patient in their own clinic at night while bringing the twins with him so he would be able to help them with homework when he had one or two minutes of free time, leaving them with his assistant most of the time. Yet, even though they were both busy and barely had time for each other or their family, they could still find at least a day in a month to be with the twins or had a drive somewhere just the two of them.

They were doing good, or maybe it was only him who thought like that because in a week after he heard about the rumor, he found out that the rumor was true. Ryosuke, his spouse, cheated on him with his workmate in the hospital he worked in.

Anger was the first thing he felt, followed with a strong wave of disappointment that crushed his heart.

Yamada Ryosuke never thought that he would do that to Nakajima Yuto, to his spouse, to the person that he vowed to love forever. He didn’t mean to hurt him, he didn’t want to hurt him. But whatever he said now would not take back what he had done behind his back. It would not erase his sin of betraying his vow nor make the pain in Yuto’s heart go away.

He did this.

He broke Yuto,

And their family…

It started as something that didn’t worth telling. He and Okamoto Keito… they were just co-workers who worked in the same hospital and it was only that. He didn’t have feelings for him and the guy who was three years older than him also knew that he had a spouse and sons, the line was drawn in between them and he didn’t intend to cross it. They were mere co-workers which then became friends without him even realizing it, and soon they talked a lot about their lives in between break.

They never did something that should be called as flirting or leading each other on, or so he wanted to think about it. More than once Keito passed him a pen when he needed one to write his report and his fingers lingered for a second too long while his eyes stared at him and the way he curved his lips… it was as if he held his hand in purpose. He thought nothing of that but a simple tease from a friend, it was nothing serious and he shouldn’t make it as a big deal.

He loved Yuto and he didn’t have that kind of feelings to Keito.

But he liked the attention that Keito gave him. He liked that he noticed things, smallest things about him, praising him and making him feel like he was special. Keito looked at him like he wanted him and he didn’t hate it. He liked to be the object of his affection, he liked it because he paid attention to him, because he gave him a cup of coffee and a stem of fresh rose on his desk every morning, because he opened the door for him, because he helped him with parking when he couldn’t do it properly…

He liked to be with Okamoto Keito because he made him to feel romance once again.

And it’s something that Nakajima Yuto forgot…

He couldn’t remember when was the last time Yuto looked at him in the eye and told him that he loved him. He couldn’t remember when was the last time Yuto held his hand and kissed his lips. He couldn’t remember when was the last time Yuto cuddling him in bed and they told each other about their day until they fell asleep. He couldn’t remember any of that…

He knew that Yuto still loved him, that Yuto’s love was not less than what he had when he proposed him years ago. He knew that… but it was not enough.

It was not enough because he wanted Yuto to look at him like the way he always looked at him in the past. He wanted Yuto to show him how much he loved him because he needed to hear it, he needed to know that Yuto still want him and find him attractive. He just wanted Yuto to care about him more, to see him more and touch him the way he had always touched him before.

Maybe that was why he did that. Maybe that was why he was leading Keito on and on, never told the older guy to stop escorting him and started to say yes to his invitation to hang out just the two of them.

But it hurt when he let Keito to hold his hand. It hurt because he wanted it to be Yuto’s. His heart twinge painfully when he forgot the feeling of Yuto’s hand holding his…

“Ryosuke” Keito called his name and he lifted his eyes to look at him, finding the emotions oozing from Keito’s eyes. The yearning, affection, desire, love… it’s everything he wanted. It’s everything he missed…

And at that moment, when he saw the way Keito was staring at him… the painful loneliness was gone. Yuto was gone. His status as a spouse was gone. He was no one but a person that Okamoto Keito loved to the point he was willing to cross few rules and boundaries. And it felt so good.

“I’m okay” he laced his finger on his hand, holding it back and giving it a reassuring squeeze. Keito smiled at him, leaning in to kiss him as his hand was taking off the wedding band on his finger.

He knew this was bad.

He knew that what was going to happen would be something that he would regret later.

He knew that this would probably break everything that he had with Yuto.

But he didn’t stop him.

a/n: I've had this in my folder since forever. Finally had the will to re-read and post it instead of erasing the whole thing XD


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